"ADA ADA SAJA "

That was a  reaction i got from the mister after telling him that i want to learn brush calligraphy and (now wanting) to learn watercolor-ing (especially floral) 🥀. But actually mister is quite supportive in everything i do as long as the stuff that i wants  won't causing a big hole to his pocket. 

But then he is commenting that why i need to do so many stuff at the same time. A stay at home mom who occupied with kids and house chore everyday, with the self taught sewing thingy and now want to terjun pula on arts. His main concern that how am i going to divide to do so many things at a time. Well not everyday i sews, not everyday i practice calligraphy. I only do them when i wants to and only when the kids off to bed at night. I really not fond any art related esp drawing stuff back then during school days  because obviously i cant draw. semua orang lidi saja. Now, suda tua baru mau sibuk belajar arts. Well may be because im staying at home 24 hr made me to try something new other than the daily routine.

Same thing when he found out a coffee at the bathroom. He asking what is it for an i said it's for scrubbing and i offer him if he wants to try but he say no thank you. Again he gave me this comment.  'ei ada -ada saja ko ni' and adding whose idea it is using coffee for scrubbing, it mean for drink.

Same thing with my makeup stuffs. But luckily, my obsession with makeup went normal nowadays. Lucky mister, he dont have to accompany me to visit drugstore store every month.

p/s pls excuse my rusty writing.

HELLO 2017 AND THE RESOLUTIONS

Entering second week of the year. How is life so far? Anyway happy new year to everyone. I hope it is not too late to wish everyone. As usual, every year we celebrated new year at hometown. And what more thrilling was we had an unplanned road trip to Pitas and Kota Marudu on the NYE eve with the kids using Marak-Parak road 👏👏.  Hihi that was what happened on the NYE eve..and i dont want to elaborate more on that.

Straight forward, listing a resolutions is a must for everyone except for me last year I did not really bother to list down any. Thinking back i did not even remember why i did not cause every year i never failed to jots down any. Waking up every morning without any goals to achieve and facing the same routine is kinda boring and tongkat dagu tidak tau apa mau buat except the same damn routine everday. So for this year i bravely listing my resolutions at least..

So here we go.

For myself / family 👭👬

• to be a better person for husband and the kids, avoiding gossips and conflicts 
• read more books
• closer to God 
• more educational activities for the kids
• be organized 

Arts/Craft/Passion💖

• sew more and start a small at home business
• attending formal sewing class/ buying reference book for sewing
• attending cake decorating class
• learn brush calligraphy
• back to crocheting 
• blogging more 

 Travel ✈

• at least 2 road trips and 1 plane trip outside Sabah

I have few more unlisted resolutions but I think the above are adequate as a guideline.

See you next post.

LUKE TURNS ONE

How time flies. It feels so yesterday i gave birth to Luke (read his birth story here) and now he is a year old toddler. Walking and and climbing. Still clingy to mummy. Love to explore and even know how to annoys his sister. His favorite song is Five Little Monkey Jumping On The Bed that I let him watch every time i need to do something.

PLANTING PORTULACA

We were at kampung last week for a week. Besides good food and companies to talk with and catching up with the family, i adore every little thing about kampung. Well who doesn't right?

It is always my dream at least owning few plants that cared and planted by myself. I've been trying to plant some here at home but it dried and died. And worst, my veggies did not show up after sowing. I gave up and hold everything. Threw all of the soil and packed those brown vases into storage room. Pathetic. I know. 

SELF TAUGHT SEWING

Why did not i discovered early that I actually attracted to sewing. Back then, my mum owned a sewing machine but i never really interested plus im still so young and what i knew is playing with the treadle sewing machine. Until now i don't really know how to operate it. Plus, the sewing machine was broken and is kept in the storage house at hometown. My first ever small project when i was young, was a simple small tote bag. Hand sewn. I really wants to own one until i decided to sew one for myself from a scrap fabric. It turned out nice until my sister had it for herself since i went to boarding school. And no more sewing related stuff until I purchased my portable sewing machine 4y ago. But did not really utilize it because i was pregnant with Hazel. 

WISHLIST : MAKEUP AND TOOLS

image from google

Suddenly, without any notice the excitement for make up went up high. Smitten with make up stuffs after few years did not bothering checking brand new products launched at Watsons because once i start buying i CAN'T STOP. Sephora is in KK already, but to be frank I only been there once. And that time, my mojo for makeup still malu-malu kucing to make it's appearance. Just blankly stared those pretty eyeshadows, lip cream, tools and etc.

And now i want to own my own basic make up stuffs. And here come the list!!

LUKE'S BIRTH STORY

It is still fresh in my mind when i delivered  Hazel even it was 3 years ago. i still remember everything. shared the story of giving birth to hazel in my old not active anymore blog. too bad i didn't back up the post and it was forever gone. i should have right? or may be i can write it down in a book/ journal so that hazel can read when she grow up... who knows, may be she wonders her own birth story. 

And now i want to share Luke's. im afraid that i mix up their birth story and even worst, kalau ada rezeki dorang ada adik lagi... nah mungkin that time sa lupa suda kan.

so here is the chronology of giving birth to Luke.

THINGS I DO TO DE-STRESS

cant get over putting this beautiful stock photo into my every post

SAHM, FTWM, WAHM or whatever mama you are if comes to handling house chores and kids it is always challenging. Juggling motherhood, wifehood and works (in my case the house chores) is crazy. How to divide the brain to concentrate on so many things at the same time. I love to stay at home 24/7 but sometimes when things get a bit complicated like when kids not behave, kids fighting over toys, food is everywhere on the floor, too many uncompleted chores, tired and did not sleep well at night and many more...it leads to stresssss.

Here how i de-stress myself. Kalau stress lama-lama pun bikin sakit. 

SKINCARE PRODUCTS THAT I USE

Since giving birth to Hazel i never really back to normal skincare routine -cleanse, toner and moisturize. Cleansing will do. Too lazy to do the other two steps. I don't care about my skincare routine. My kids is my priority.

HOBBIES AND FLUTTER SLEEVE DRESS

sometimes im confused with my own hobbies. sometimes im into sewing. then into baking. then so into gardening. and soooo into makeup too. sometimes i want to do all of them at the same time. i guess i have so much time to daydream until i wanted to do all of them.

what to blog

Oh hello bloggers.

I really don't have idea what to blog first. too many to share actually but i know they may not worth to be posted here. Some too random, some too personal and some to just not worth to be shared publicly. Frankly, i really misses those blogging days. It was a good time when you found a virtual friends. Sharing thoughts, sharing opinions and all.

So, if i really want to into blogging again, what should i write? Im no good at writing. Hahaha so lacking.

Product review? Oh I seldom bought stuffs nowadays. Makeup? Skincare?

Oh i just dont know what to blog about.

So mostly plain random stuffs la.

So see you again in the next post

Hazel at 33 months

Hazel is currently 33 months and in 2months time she will be 3 years old. Soon will enter pre-school. Time real flies. It is just like yesterday i gave birth to her. She is not that fluent in talking yet sometimes me myself her mummy who with her 24/7 find it is hard to understands what she was talking. She will get angry if i don't get what she trying to say. Funny at the same time.

Since she is almost 3yo, she can count 1-10 in English and Malay. Have yet to teach her to count in Dusun too. Hopefully, in few months she can recognize the numbers and alphabets too. She can sing ABC song half way only by now. And she recognize colors too. Thanks to Youtube. She holds pencil perfectly. Our white color wall has had her "amazing drawing".

In term of social, I can see that she is still developing. She know how to hang out with other kid. Mula2 malu kucing lah, suda in baru inda ingat dunia kalau main. She knows how to say Thank You too. 

She is 100% diaper free since end of last year. And now she can wear her own pants without me helping. And if she is in a good mood, she will pee/poop on her own in her potty. Sinang kerja mummy. But still need to wash her lah.

Her favorite toys atm is her kitchen sets. Her daddy bought her a bigger sets last time and i think she have more than 5 small set. Can you imagine how messy our house everyday? She loves to pour them all on the floor and pick which one she wants to play. 

Anyway that all i can think off by now.

Here Hazel's at age of 7hours. Always my first baby!!

A come back, maybe

So, its been almost a year since I last blog. Missing blogging so much but with two kids, it prohibit me to doing so. So what happen after almost a year?

Firstly, I'm a mommy of two. Delivered a baby boy on 6th October 2015 on fine morning weigh 3.1kg. We named him Luke Avannus. And he is now 4 months. And he's been started rolling since he was 3m3w. So people been asking me what is the different delivering a baby girl and boy. Hahah no difference at all. Same pain on the same spot. I cant tell how pain it is. Indescribable. God knows. Anyway, i might be sharing my birth story soon.

Here, Luke aged only 2hours.

Secondly, yes I'm still a SAHM. Been a SAHM since end of year 2012. I loved to work  but this is not the right time tho the fact that we need extra sources to raise our kids. With the economy downturn nowadays, it is good to have both parent working. But to think of sending my kids to be cared by someone is a pain. So hard to find babysitter nowadays. So looking for a job is put on hold now.

Love you two, sweethearts!!!

Hurmmm..i cant think of another stuff to update here...so see you all soon again ya..

So that is my comeback post..

What a long hiatus

Hello everybody. Its been a while. My last post is about 4 months ago. What a long.....hiatus. Missing reading all blogs that i followed and so do missing rambling here. Anyway, let me just list few 'updates' of myself.

Firstly, we are here at hometown since March And may be will be stayed here until end of the year. That's a long stay kan. I have my own reason(s) tho. 

Secondly, we are going to 4 this coming October. Yes im pregnant with second baby. Coming to 6th months. So glad that I survived the first trimester's which yeah not so comfortable. So thankful to God for the patience, courage and strength. I prays hard that i had that strength until i deliver our baby. And baby, mummy hope you grows healthy inside mummy's womb.

Lastly, Hazel turns 2 last month. She is not a baby anymore and some more going to be a big sister soon. It was a mixed feeling seeing her grows. Happy and emotional. How time flies. If i can turn back time,  i want to rewind those day when she was a newborn.

Huh blogging from a mobile phone is not convenient. So see you in a later post. More stories and update..hihi

Preparing to graduate Hazel

First of all, I should thank God for giving me a chance able to breastfeed Hazel until this very moment. So thankful and grateful. It was not rainbow journey of course. From breast engorgement, milk blister and so on I'm glad that I choose to BF although not exclusively anymore. Another 3 months, Hazel will hit 2 and that the ideal age to stop breastfeeding. And that I'm planing to do.

The other day, we had a short conversation. Yes with Hazel. She is now understand well tho she barely speak. I asked her to stop nenen and she cried. I told her that i will put chilli on. She cried and stomped on my feet, walked away and back cried hard on my lap. Teary red eyes with snot. Took me some time to comfort her.  I think she wasn't ready yet.

I had a conversation my friend on how to encourage Hazel to quit. Her first tips was to put a chilli on. But I not dare to try. I don't think I can endure the 'hotness' later. Next is to apply red hamoi on to scare Hazel that she might think that red color is blood. Then the other mum interrupt our conversation and she say 'nanti pandai berhenti tu kalau Hazel ada adik'. Huh, I'm not ready yet for another additional members.

So until now I have not mention to Hazel about her quitting. She still love very much sucking until fell asleep and will crawl to me at night and pulling up my shirt and shifting sucking from one to another and fell asleep again. And she call it neneih when she wanted to.

Anyone can share a tips here?

Don't force me to quit!!

Sleeping late

Day by day, Hazel (of course) a demand baby and smarter. Some mummy's old tricks is no longer working. Since birth, Hazel is a good baby. Very less crying. But not until recently. Crying over everything till a point that I almost give up to persuade her. But then I realized that the crying is her way to communicate. She barely speak now. Most of the time speaking her own 'language'. And of course mummy is so blur  - _ -. Up until now not more than 20 word she can pronounce clearly like minum, shoes, momom, mandi, youtube, papa, auntie, daddy, mummy, mama, kakak, bobo and etc.

These couple of weeks, Hazel went to bed real late. The earliest is 12pm and sometimes she will fell asleep almost 1pm. She only nap once during the day but still off to bed really late. As usually we will prepare to sleep at 8.30- 9.00 pm and she will fell asleep 30 mins -1 hour later. But not recently. Sometimes she pull my arms and lead me to the our room door's knob and there two of us at living room at midnight. I know that if this situation last more than 2 weeks, i will never having my beauty sleep. Before sleep, normally it's her daddy's turn to entertain her with her fav MV song at Youtube and usually will turn to me 20-30 mins later and my turn to cuddle her and we both sleep soundly. But these couple of weeks, I just cant stand it. She refuse to sleep even after breastfeed and cuddling. She demand to me to play with her. Huh..

kids nowadays...

So, this is the time i should 'play' tho it hurts my instinct as a mother. When she cried for me to entertain her I turn my back against her and pretending to sleep. I can hear a short whine and begin to hug me from the back. Kalau ikut hati mau saja peluk balik but kuatkan hati sajalah. In a dimmed light she will crawl onto me and calling me. I still pretend sleeping. She gave up and crawl back to her sleeping area. She will hug her pillow, changing lying position, talking to teddy, humming her song, doing nothing, blinking her eyes and the cycle will repeat till she fell asleep by herself. Yay, who says that mummy's trick was not successful? It was. There were few times this trick worked. Sometimes it will be accompany by a super food, breast milk.

fell asleep by her own for the first time, cuddling teddy and slept horizontally as always. Baby, it supposed to be like this. Mummy loves you.

Unchecked : Road Trip to Simpang Mengayau, Kudat

It was an unplanned road trip by the way. Because husband never say a thing about this trip prior off from KK. Huh. Husband said that spending the weekend here in KK is boring. So we off from home nearly 1pm. Lewat kan? I was reluctant because I have not prepare anything for the trip. So I had a quick drop on our house at Telipok to get Hazel's essentials, power bank and camera. That all. Hazel was sleeping all the way to Kudat. What a relief juga lah. 

We arrived at Simpang Mengayau's junction around 3.00pm++. Entering the road ....i was kinda uneasy. Yeah a palm oil plantation road. Narrow and bumpy. Very few houses and cars passing by. Then I ask husband what if a stranger suddenly appear....and asking for a help.... should we stop and help... Aduh macam-macam lah bah fikiran. But thankfully, after 15 min we actually arrived!!! Yeahhhh. Finally here we were.. Tip Of Borneo. 

I was eager to came down which the same spot husband standing but I don't want to take the risk. Slippery, steep and I don't think I can handle the ocean. Waves is quite hard because it was quite windy and the water was so green to my eyes. And frankly to say that the water there make me goosebumps. Spent about an hour there. Adoring the view, feeling the breeze, took pictures and berlari-lari sama Hazel and that all.

Honestly, nothing much can be done here unless if staying for a night or two. But the view is fantastic and I'm proud to be here.

Hopefully in the future can visit again and I hope I can witness sunsets. Yay sunsets!!

We off to Kudat town for dinner and headed back to KK around 6.00pm. Dropped by a stall along KB-KK road to buy roasted corn. Safely arrived at home nearly 10.00pm.

I ask husband that we should make more road trip this year and he replied me... Sandakan!!! Cahyoooo..

Diastasis Recti

I never knew I had this problem until recently one of my friend in Instagram post about it. I quickly goggled it and do a simple test if I have Diastasis Recti or abdominal separation.And I'm can quite confirmed that I did had it. I thought it was a fat that stucked in my belly. No wonder I had those bulging tummy. How funny am I looked.. Flat at the back but a bulging tummy from the front. Well, I just can make an excuse..."Hello I'm a mummy now, I supposed (so) to be looked like this". Haha.

Of course I want to get rid of those. Who does not want a flat beautiful tummy even after giving birth. Then, I come to think that I should discipline my self last time to wear belly binder. Or if I knew I got this problem earlier, I should make an effort to exercise. But now (i think) the muscle on my belly is "hardened" or "loosened"  now...it might be so much hard to flatten my tummy.  Nah never mind. Past is past.


I did gain weight during last holiday season. Eating like a pig.. yeah because the foods was awesome. Since I gave birth I never get my 49kg pre-pregnancy weight. The lowest that I can achieve was 50kg and the highest was as per below scale reading. Scary isn't?? My plan is to shred the 1.9kg and I hope I can do this. To be clear, I just want to keep my weight healthy.

Anyways, started a brief 30 sec plank this morning.That was the best I can hold.

Cheers!!!

Hello Twenty Fifteen

Happy New Year everyone. Just came back today from hometown. Huh, such not a lucky day for us to start the new year, it's been raining since first day of twenty-fifteen. And East Coast of Peninsular Malaysia and few districts in the state was affected by flood. I only hoping for the flood to be subsided soon. And I hope those people who affected are strong enough to face this. And, few days before twenty-forteen ended, another airplane crash. It was devastating news and i can't do nothing but praying for the family/friends of the victims to have strength to face this. I hope there is no further speculation as it involved somebody's life.

Anyways, for me nothing specific goals for 2015 but only hoping for a better living, peace, strength, healthy and positivity. I don't want to stress myself listing/ accomplished a never ending goals/list.

I wish you best of 2015!!!

new planner, by the way

Blue Themed Wedding

Finally, my big sis is married now. I'm so happy for her and I wish them happily ever after. The wedding was about 2 weeks ago. Personally, I'm glad I'm able to help making her big day a success. Tho, I can't help much (as Hazel is so clingy). Since, I've been through this phase once (hihi) so roughly I can contribute an idea. During my time there was so much drawbacks (oh I don't want to recall that).

Here some of the photos during the day.

So finally, all the sister in the family is taken.

That lady in blue is my wonderful mama congratulating and welcoming my bro in law to the family.

Upon arriving at my family's house.

 Once again, Congratulation big sis and bro in law.